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Three Keys to Deep Seduction

Keep these powerful seduction techniques in your bag of tricks and treats this season.

By: N'diah Love
By: N'diah Love

Read Time: 2 Minutes

Seduction is an aspect of soft power and has many different elements, just to name a few: the promise and provision of pleasure, enticement, emotional manipulation, suggestion, and influence. In essence, seduction is the wielding of soft power in order to get someone to do what you would like them to do. However, deep seduction is a potent and longer-lasting psychological process that allows you to live always in the deep recesses in your targets’ minds. It can create a profound feeling of dependence within your partner and secure your place on a pedestal in their minds. Politicians and celebrities alike use deep seduction.  With these three powerful techniques I provide, you will be able to seduce a man, a woman, or even a crowd of people. However, please note that you will have to learn and practice each technique to use it effectively and responsibly.


Keep in mind that each technique may not suit your style of seduction, nor will it work on every single person you come in contact with. Read Robert Greene’s “The Art of Seduction” to better understand your potential seducer archetype and the different types of targets.

Tune Into Him

Understanding what someone wants (from you or life in general), without them explicitly stating it, is a unique skill used in the arenas of business and negotiation. However, it can be just as effective in the realm of dating and seduction. When you’re dating a man, it’s safe to assume that he wants to sleep with you. But what else is he after? Is it to feel masculine, young, or desirable? Or is it to feel cherished and venerated? Most men grew up without the luxury of being honest and open about how they feel without judgment. Using these techniques, will create a safe space for him to be himself while also generating a deeper rapport.


Keep in mind that each technique may not suit your style of seduction, nor will it work on every single person you come in contact with. Read Robert Greene’s “The Art of Seduction” to better understand your potential seducer archetype and the different types of targets.


Learn How to Hold Space

Have you ever met someone to whom you instantly felt comfortable spilling all of your dirty little secrets? These types of people make you feel safe, unjudged, and understood. And while most people do this unconsciously, there is a name for what it is that they have mastered. Holding space in the yogic tradition is becoming a witness to someone’s existence without judgment, desire, or distraction. Essentially, it is being a great listener. Learning how to hold space for someone is incredibly powerful because you are learning to detach yourself from their personal feelings instead of being empathetic while also understanding their fears, desires, traumas, and needs on a deep level.

You can employ this technique by telling him what he feels after you hold space.

Example: He’s mentioned briefly how his days tend to go, the type of people he meets,  or maybe he’s been traveling non-stop for weeks attending various meetings, etc. So perhaps you then squeeze his forearm, look him in the eyes and say, “Oh, you must be so exhausted with talking to people all day. I bet you wish you could escape by yourself to a private island…”


This simple gesture lets him know that you SEE him and you’re listening. He will begin to feel connected to you as he’ll probably feel like you’ve read his mind. 

I would also suggest that you learn how to design questions to let him know that you are interested in what he is talking about. Check out my first date questions article to jog your imagination.

I would consider this technique harder than others to grasp. However, once mastered; you will be able to uncover anyone’s desires. Understanding what someone wants (but does not have) is a powerful weapon in the arena of seduction.

Bring Him Into Your World

Creating confusion or discomfort will typically always give you an edge in the realm of seduction. Taking your man out of his comfort zone (and into yours) will force him to look to you for confirmation and guidance. This also builds trust.  HV men are typically in control of their lives and often the lives of others. They may operate on a tight schedule and run a tight ship. These men are the perfect targets to employ this technique because they are not expecting it nor will they be able to forget it.

For example, maybe your man is a regular patron at a 5-star steakhouse; it’s his favorite restaurant. Perhaps, on the next date night, you suggest an attractive Persian restaurant with belly dancers that you’ve been to or maybe a sexy lounge that he’s never heard of or wouldn’t dream of going to. And if your relationship is on a higher level, you can even invite him to a birthday dinner with your friends.

Bringing him into your world gives you an advantage and positions you as a woman with her own life and interests. This is a highly attractive trait. He will feel like getting to know you is an adventure.  Use discernment, and have fun with this one!

Bonus Skill:

You can also employ this technique by being a great storyteller. The best politicians tell stories to connect with their audience emotionally. If you are the type of person, who can keep someone on the edge of their seat, try telling a funny or exciting story the next time you are out with your beau.


Intoxicate Him

Escapism is the name of the game. Most people desire an escape from the monotony of their everyday life, even those who you may look at and think, “He/she has everything they could want.”  As you begin to understand your target through inquisitive and sincere questions, you may realize that he is missing excitement, fantasy, intrigue, or sometimes downright fun.

Become a Sensualist

Most of us knew Cleopatra for her ability to enchant all who knew her completely. She was dramatic and a true depiction of the siren who bore no expense when she intended to seduce and enrapture. She was a sensualist who paid attention to detail. And although we are not trying to capture the heart of Mark Antony or Julius Cesar, we can still apply her seduction techniques today.

This is the time to dial into your sensuality. When he’s around you, what is he seeing, smelling, touching, hearing, and even tasting? In the world of seduction, everything is intentional. The dress you choose to wear, the perfume you dab on your neck and wrists, how you do your makeup and hair, the questions you ask, the decision to touch him or to forgo touch until the very end of the night, the foods you order; each decision should be made with enticement or enchantment in mind.


Play With Distance

You can also intoxicate him by playing with physical distance. Lean in when you speak to him as if you have a secret to share, then retreat to your space when you’re done. Or maybe you’re at an event with him, and he’s speaking to his friends. Excuse yourself to the ladies’ room and then play in his periphery a while, allowing him to see you at the corner of his eye. He’ll be unable to focus on the conversation in front of him and be focused on finding you. Distance plays into delayed gratification and anticipation and leads to a more profound feeling of seduction. As soon as he thinks he’s got you. Retreat a bit and watch him chase.

I wrote this article to help you view seduction from a different perspective, however, not neglecting what we already know. Seduction can be used on anyone at any time. Practice these techniques with that in mind.

For more, follow us at @letssweettalk XO

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