Photo by Bannon Morrissy
We’ve all done it!
Read Time: 2 Minutes
Ladies, fumbling the bag is something we’ve all done. We meet or even go on a few dates with a guy we REALLY like, and for some reason…it doesn’t work out. Now, there could be plenty of reasons why it didn’t work out on his end, but I’m all about accountability. Instead of wondering what he may or may not have going on that has led to him not calling or not inviting you out, consider that you may have fumbled the bag! Nobody is perfect, and sometimes you have an off day…or an off WEEK (hell, even a month!). From my personal experience, most of the times, I missed out on a great guy; I can trace it to one of the ways I mention below! Read on to discover modern dating turn-offs
Like I mentioned above, sometimes you just had an off night. You knew you had absolutely NO BUSINESS going on a date because you were stressed because of work or family issues. Or maybe you just needed to be alone in your house, watching Sex and the City, drinking wine from the bottle. We all have those times, and when we’re not in tune, we may decide to go on a date even though that’s not what we truly needed.
9 times out of 10, when you first start dating a guy, he’s out on the dating market actively pursuing and dating other women. That means initially, his time is limited. If he chooses to pursue you, that is him showing you he likes you, and the least you can do is return the favor because why else are you on the date? If I’m a guy and I ask a woman out, and she says yes, I’m going to assume that at the very least, she’s interested. If when I get to the actual date, she is being cold and “playing hard to get,” I’m probably going to cut my losses and pursue the other women who seem to like me.
Ladies, the best way to get the men that you want is to understand their thought processes. Why would he waste his time with someone who isn’t showing interest? Now, I don’t mean sleep with him the first night, but it should be evident that you want to see him again, especially if he is showing a lot of interest in you.
Have you ever heard of “mouth diarrhea”? This happens when you don’t understand the art of conversation. You should be guiding the discussion on a date but allowing him to lead it, meaning you ask the questions; he answers and perhaps asks you a few questions. Inevitably, when you talk too much, you reveal too much
I’ve eavesdropped in a few social media conversations, and it seems that women are confusing “being the prize” with being lazy. The Art of Seduction is actual work. It’s used in business, politics, and many different relationship dynamics. The Art of Seduction is about strategy, and it is by no means lazy. When you are actively dating, just as you want a great experience, men want a great experience too. Once you understand this, your ability to capture and keep a man’s interest long-term gets better and better. Seduction is all about providing someone an experience that they never knew they needed.
Allowing yourself to be viewed as a counterpart is the most obvious and essential points. Thinking back to the date, did you come off as all work and no play? Maybe you came off as career-centered, strategic, and dominant. Did you guys argue on the date? Either way, you did not come across as his natural counterpart. You came across as his competitor. Conversations centered around work or things where you may have a strong opinion are not sexy. Save these types of conversations for when he’s locked in, and he already sees you as his feminine counterpart. Not a moment sooner.
This article may be a hard pill to swallow, but the sooner you consume it, the sooner its nutrients will drastically benefit you! XOXO
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